tertinggal

aku merasa tertinggal, tapi aku tidak tahu apa yang kukejar. aku merasa tertinggal, tapi aku datang sendiri, tidak ada yang meninggalkanku. aku takut tertinggal, tapi tidak ada yang benar-benar ingin…

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A True Story of A Hormone Monster Survivor

7 years ago I met the man that turned to be the love of my life. After about 2 months in our relationship, we decided to take it another step forward and went to get tested in a sex health clinic, so that we could ditch the condoms and start using the “best” option of birth control the market has to offer — the pill.

I was given by my gynecologist at the time, a pill called Yasmin. The first 2 months of using that pill were very confusing, I was bleeding constantly, the bleeding became heavier after sex, I started to feel a certain pain in my lower abdomen that never disappeared since. My gynecologist wasn’t alarmed at all and was happy to run all kinds of tests, including colposcopy, which is quite invasive and painful, only to inform me in the end of those 2 months — that nothing is wrong with me and all the symptoms I was having might be just the pill side effects. So, you would think a giant red blinking bulb would appear over my head? not at all! I was so clueless, I agreed to try a different pill called Femminet.

The bleeding stopped and my 6 years of synthetic hormones saga has begun.
I suffered an imperishable amount of urinary tract infections, literally every Monday, think about the amounts of antibiotics my system had to deal with in addition to the pill. I started to feel pain during sex and my system got so dry we had to use lube everytime we wanted to have sex. Slowly but surely I was going in this “zombie” mode, it felt like a cycle of hell, from my point of view I was supposed to be a happy and in love young women but the pill did not allow that.
It got worse when the pap test I did came back positive, then went through another colposcopy hell that included lab biopsy. The biopsy came back from the lab bringing bad news, change in cells L1. My doctor advised to wait for 7 (!!!) years and let it either disappear on it’s own or continue to change towards cancer. He offered another option, which I chose to take, to go though a laser procedure and come back every 6 months for a followup and checkup colposcopy for the next 5 years.

I’m a happy and a successful Daysy user for the past year and a half now, never had a single urinary tract infection since, I gained back the control over my life and body, gained my true self back, I can think clearly without having that fog over my head all the time, and I am generally happy, just as I was before I started using the damn pill.

OCASE for Daysy

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